MerBack In Action

MerBack In Action: An Online Journal

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

For my Mom

Happy Birthday my Angel Mother!
What would my life be without my mother?   I thought it might be fun to consider it, to try and capture a tiny morsel of what MY mother really has done for me.  I won't do her justice...I haven't the time nor the capacity to understand her sacrifice.  I know I will never know even a 100th of the thoughts, worries, prayers and concerns that have gone swimming through her compassionate mind in my behalf.  But here is a small sampling of "What ifs" that come to my mind today on my Angel Mothers' birthday.  

What would it have been like if my mother didn't tell me she loved me at least once a day.  What if I had a mother that never said she loved me?  What if I didn't wholeheartedly believe that it was true?  What if her actions told me that I didn't come first in her life?  What would I be like today?  What would I have done in High School without a mother who's sincerity, sense of humor and interest in my life and the life of those I loved made my home "the hangout" anytime, day or night?  Without a Mother who allowed sleepovers with wild raucous, obnoxious high school girls that disturbed her from nights already poisoned by insomnia.  
What would I do without a mother who I needed so much that I ached with homesickness for her my entire first semester of college... who wrote me letters, sent me packages and answered my phone calls at 2 am to get me through my hardest times.  What would my wedding have been like with any other mother to plan it for me in it's entirety?   Not nearly the smashing party of the century that I still remember:
What would I be without a mother who taught me to LOVE to dance and to love music with a good, hip shakin'  beat?  I know my college years wouldn't have been nearly as fun! 
And what would child birth have been like without my Mother there to hold a leg;)  Without my mom after the births would I have been making meals by day 3 (you can always count on 2 days of mormon meal delivery;) and living on 3 hours of sleep each night?
Who would have taught me how to give Isaac a bath and encouraged me through nursing?  And who would have brought me trays of fruit and cheese while I lazed about watching feel good movies?  Could I love my children enough if I didn't have my Mom to carry half the load?  She is the softer, spoiling side that as a mother I can not be.   And this side of her is something they need in their life, this made obvious by simply watching them adore her.   
There isn't a doubt in my mind that someone in this world treasures me.  What greater happiness is there in life than this.  I am so grateful for a Mother that has always given my that confidence...100%.  I love you, Mom!  Happy Birthday...I am sending thoughts, prayers, hugs, kisses, apologies, laughter, love and all the goodness that I have in me your way today!  I miss being with you day in and day out and I always will.  XOXOX

Monday, February 9, 2009

Spice Girls, Anyone?

Some friends of ours threw a Murder Mystery Party on Saturday night....Spice Girls was the theme.  I willingly accepted the role of Posh Spice and Joey, David Beckham.  It was a blast!  We even pulled through with British accents all night.  The audience/guests also came dressed up in 80's and 90's clothing.  I think I'll enjoy looking back at these stellar outfits!
From the left, Baby Spice, Sporty Spice, Posh and Ginger Spice
The best part of my outfit...the shoes!
Notice Tyler on the left with a T-shirt that says I Love Posh.  In the murder saga, he was supposed to be my stalker.  And see little Mikah (sp?) Bahr in the background there...hilarious!
Jodi with a scrunchie in her hair.
The Sherlocks in 80's gear
I love the chain on Rich's jeans.  
Julies outfit might have been my fav.
These guys found these at Goodwill.  I would love to know the previous owners and the story behind these bad boys.
Rico, our manager, David Beckham, our bodyguard, Bubba and Bucky, the stalker.
All of us
XOXO,
David and Posh

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Late night chat with a 4 year old

I was going to go to bed and not bother with posting.   But my motherly emotional side beat my big lazy bum side and drug me over to the computer.  This conversation I had with Isaac tonight is worth documenting:

Me:  "Okay kids I'll lay down with you for one minute and then it's bed time...no more words."

Silence that lasts about 20 seconds...20 seconds long enough to put Georgie to sleep.

Isaac:  "Mommy, I'm not good at building legos.  I just try to build with legos but its just trash, trash, trash.  I try to build airplanes and stuff but it's trashy stuff.   Benjamin's good at building legos but I'm not and I want to be good."

Me:  "How do you know Benjamin is good at building legos?"

Isaac:  "Because I've seen him.  He builds real stuff not trash."

Me:  "Did you know that Benjamin's big brother Mikey builds with legos too.  I know you saw the cool airplane he built tonight.  Maybe he has helped Benjamin learn how to build with legos.  With all those lego sets at their house I'll bet Benjamin has had lots of practice.  Maybe he could teach you how to build with them.  Maybe you could ask for a set for your birthday and practice with them until you learn how."

Isaac thinks this is a great idea and then begins talking about what kind of birthday party he wants.  

Isaac:  "Can Ben Foster and Isaac R come to my party?  They're my only friends that are never mean to me (this is because he rarely plays with these friends and has not yet had the chance to hit them repeatedly).  But Maile told me that I was cute tonight, " he grins from ear to ear and then releases a sheepish little giggle.    

Me:  "That's so nice...and what did you say?"

Isaac:  "I told her that she was cute too," still grinning.  "And Benjamin cheers me up when I am sad.  When I walk into school he says 'ISAAC'!  Sometimes he hugs me!" still grinning.  "And Brett gives me my light saber when I want it.  One time I said I wanted my light saber and you wouldn't listen to me so Brett went and got it for me.  He did that for me."

Me:  "That's so nice, Isaac.  You have the nicest friends."

Isaac:  chuckle..."Ya...."  "I miss Samuel."  voice now trembling.  "I want to see Samuel," small tears...

Me:  I explain that Samuel is coming to visit us in a month and that now he has Samuel AND all these great new friends.  This seems to suffice.  

Isaac:  "I think Samuel is going to bed too and he is dreaming..."  Big smile appears on his face... "...about me!  That's what I'm going to do.  I'm going to dream about playing with Samuel."

He then begins to ramble on about the dream he's going to have about playing with his best buddy from San Antonio.  At this point I morph back into the disengaged Mom and tune him out entirely until I've had enough tuning out and want to move into my own bed.  So, doing my best not to interrupt mid sentence I interject, "Okay, no more words buddy...I love you...XOXOX".  Eyes closed.

"...no man is useless
-- while he has a friend."  
-Robert Louis Stevenson